I haven’t written a blog in a very long time. I haven’t journaled very much either. I HATE that. It’s like I’ve lost a big part of who I am. So I’m not going to put it off any longer. I’m reclaiming that part of me.
This one short blog will not even come close to all of the thoughts I have floating around in my head. I feel like my brain is on overdrive just trying to keep up with my life (that, however, is no one’s fault but my own).
What follows is my attempt to delineate just one of the fleeting thoughts that visited my mind today…
9 months and 8 days. No one in my life right now knows the significance of that number. That’s how long I have been in the States since my 11-month internship in South Africa.
So what did I learn over there?
Community.
That was always my answer. It stood out more than anything else. It was both the most unexpected and the most difficult lesson I learned.
In retrospect, I stand by my answer.
My heart really misses the community we had there. I miss having a roommate and a friend who I (finally) learned to earnestly trust. I could share anything with her. We prayed together and for each other often. We’d stay up late talking about dreams and ideas and nothing at all. We went to war with the bugs, spiders, ladybugs, and bats that always found their way into our room. We gazed open-mouthed and awestruck at an incredible lightning show and watched the fires that burned the distant hills on the horizon. We scaled mountains, played with penguins, and learned together. We relied on each other; and, more importantly, we helped each other rely on God. We spoke truth into each others’ lives even when it was difficult.
But it wasn’t just with her. The community there…it was beautiful. The way it is supposed to be. Thoroughly flawed, but overflowing with love. All 10 of us interns – we saw each other at our best and our worst. We really knew one another. And we still loved genuinely.
I learned so much from living in a community like that. I learned how to really love people…how to trust.
It was the most difficult part of the entire year. Hands down.
And I miss it.
I miss listening thru the wall hearing you guys talk “about dreams and ideas and nothing at all.” Maybe you should make a little trip out here again. Soon… say Christmas?
You miss it and it very much misses you!
i have a huge smile on my face. i am so glad you are blogging again.
community. authenticity. trust. things i value so much as well. the relationships i genuinely have those things in are the ones that mean the most to me. they are the most challenging, yes, but they are also the most rewarding.
loving you.
i love you jody.
and did i mention I LOVED THIS.
i can’t picture you not writing in your journal; it was your outlook on everything. i’m praying for you and missing you and loving you girl..
yeah, i know…i can’t picture me without a journal either. so i finally picked it up again!
Marc…I would LOVE to visit. and you know that. but realistically, i don’t think i can make it out there this christmas. maybe sometime next year though! (i know…lame.) I hope everything is going well though…say hey to dave and char and all of the staff from last year for me.
Alece…thanks for the push that you gave me to blog. It had been so long, it almost seemed like I couldn’t start again. Also…I read what I wrote in my journal from this day one year ago, and it was the day that we first saw you and had class with you after you had been gone for 5 or 6 months! Crazy.
jace…miss you too girl! are you in Africa now???
really!?! what did you write in your journal about seeing me!? (even if it wasn’t good!)
Sorry, I’m lame with blogging. Clearly. I can’t believe it’s taking me a month to respond.
Okay, here’s what it said…
“So, for our Intro to World Missions class today we reunited with Alece and caught up with her! It was kind of weird. At one point, it was almost surreal that she’s here…she’s been gone for 5 months! It’s like I’ve gotten to know her more through her blog…like reading a lot about a person and THEN meeting them. But it WAS good to catch up. The next few months will be good. She does seem down about being back, though.”
I didn’t say why I thought it was weird…I don’t remember why I felt that way. All I remember now is LOVING it when you were around!!
Just FYI…I just read my journal entry from one year ago from today. We had just gotten back from Durban. Here is part of it…
“The conference is over now…This is my response.
God, burden me. I want to feel ALL the pain you feel over those in poverty and homelessness. Weigh me heavily with this. Break my heart. I want my heart to be broken for this…..Let me feel the FULL weight of the responsibility [you have given me] in a real and tangible way.”
Missing that. That conference to Durban really was life changing for me. It changed the way I view social justice…and my responsibility to play a part in it. So THANK YOU for that conference, for real.
jodes, i miss you too. i have a hard time making sense of how fast the time has gone by since we got back from sa. i miss our talks and laughs and confessions and even our silence. miss you, girl.
love you.
Jodes I LOVED this blog. Reading it makes me want to cry because I know that I miss the community we had. Ugh!
more blogs please!
Crystal! Miss you!!!!! We seriously need to catch up soon….maybe an email coming your way in the somewhat near future…
and I’ll get to work on more blogs…
i love reading your thoughts. i am so glad you got to know me through my blog while i was gone, and that we built on that with all our “facetime” after that. i LOVED hearing how impactful that conference was for you. so so good!
love you!
jodes. oh I miss you.
you without a journal? nuts. totally nuts. every time I finish a journal I think about you, lady. and then I wish that my finished product looked as amazing as yours always did. (damn you and your perfect handwriting!)
our imperfectly perfect community sometimes seems so far away that it’s hard for me to remember what it was like. /:
anyways, I’m super glad you’re back. I love hearing your thoughts. and I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately. weird, right?
lovelovelove you.
p.s. I just realized you posted this forever ago, so consider this as me trying to keep you accountable. so, come back and WRITE. please?